crooked_teeth
Member Since: December 1, 2009
Location: New York, NY
Do you eat fast food?
Are you a worrier or a warrior?
Sex. Who's going to have it today?
What style of jeans do you wear?
Do you/would you wear faux fur? I'm seeing it everywhere this winter...
7 and 7. Get in my belly!
Sharp angles are the answer. If you get a soft fluffy bob with round edges, it will make your face fuller. Ask for an inverted bob with razor sharp edges. Styling will actually take time, keep in mind that those angles have to be worked into existence.
Yes to your follow-up question. But make sure to ask to go before they get started.
I never drank the whole 32 ounces, and my sister did and was asked to release about 1/2 of it. Bladder sizes vary, I guess!
No! And I actually felt MORE like myself after having a child. More grounded and sure of myself, and my wants and needs. It's not an all or nothing thing, parenthood. You're still you, just with more shit to get done.
I think I'm gonna pass out. Then vomit. Then pass out again.
Peace. Sleep. And good sex.
I'd KICK SOME ASS. Not only is that disgusting, it's amoral and decidedly NOT Christian to treat people like that!
Yes! My engagement ring is a sapphire and I love it.
I hate your in-laws. That is all.
I would sleep in everyday. That would be better than any material junk I could buy.
Perhaps I should shut my mouth (or my typing fingers) but I'm sitting here reading this and I'm kind of appalled. Not by the responses that @zorbs has recieved because I think those run the gammut from as far one direction to the other as possible. (All agreeing that CHANGE is the key) The part that I'm appalled at is @thefirecat telling us all to play nice. I'm sorry but I don't actually think these responses are generally that mean. Yes, there are some pointed responses and some that don't show huge amounts of passion but @zorbs has shown from previous responses that she is a frank and to the point person. (Go look if you aren't sure.) I think if you are frank and to the point you should expect to get the same in return.
Again, I said early on in this thread that I don't love every minute of motherhood and I have found a way to deal with that. I CHOOSE to find ways to enjoy my life. My life includes being a parent and I CHOOSE to find ways to enjoy that.
Well, that's life I suppose. There's a few on this board and in real life that rant about the same shit over and over, change nothing, and wonder why things don't get better.
I think it starts out very concerned and supportive and then it gets to the point where you want to shake the person.
When you never change your approach to your problems, you can't be all that surprised or disheartened when those you seek advice from change their approach with you.
If you don't want to change your behavior, then suck it up and get over it really is the only plausible advice for you.
Wait a minute. Nowhere in all the responses I've ever heard from @zorbs has she ever said she hated her child. @lala, this isn't directed at you because there are others on this thread who have said she hates her child. I don't believe for an instant that she hates her child. It's VERY much possible to hate being a mom and still love your children.
I was talking to Ann about this earlier because of my feelings about motherhood when she was younger. And believe me, I hated being a mom. She said she never felt unloved or unwanted by me. It's because I LOVED her and her siblings, even though being a mom made me want to run screaming from the building.
Strange how a conversation like this (something that hits so close to home for me) has me feeling very defensive in Zorbs behalf because I feel like 20+ years ago I was in her exact shoes. And I remember very clearly those feelings of angst. None of us know exactly what goes on behind her closed doors, only that she has been struggling with it for a while and I wish there were more of an outpouring of compassion for her. I know that's what I would have wanted all those years ago when I was feeling so desperately trapped. This thread makes me very sad.
I have to admit that while I thought that the response from TSG and Wake and Schnauzie_Mom might have been a bit harsh right off the bat, I agree with them somewhat. @greenplanner mentioned something about it being somewhat troll-like, almost, the way that zorbs posts items like this from time to time, and that struck a chord for me.
This is an AWFULLY inflamatory topic to just post a question, respond in a short manner to one person's observational comment, and then..totally disappear.
Was a discussion desired? Was zorbs looking for support? Because it's tough to get support in any way if you post something like this, and then just walk away from the whole thing. She might be understandably busy. But really...you can't post something like this and then walk away without putting additional effort into it.
I hope she comes back, and responds to some of the comments whether she finds them supportive or argumentative or whatever...
I'm signing on as as person who relinquished my son for adoption. Yes, I was young, lots of reasons why but, bottom line, I didn't want to be a parent. I wasn't going to abandon him and did my best to have him adopted quickly so he could have loving parents.
Kind of in line with @Wake. There are different ways to provide care for a child. The child is here so you have a financial obligation but you don't have to be a mother.
I'm not writing in judgement - just sharing my situation and how hard it is to tell the truth about not wanting to be a mother.
Actually, I pretty much agree with @Wake, I just didn't have the balls to say it.
@citypittie I think people are extremely frustrated because @zorbs has a history of posting extremely troubling questions and then proceeding to deny the very question that she has asked and to disregard all attempts made to help her. It's almost to the point of trolling, actually. I think the anger is justified.
Admit to yourself that compromising to have one kid when you never wanted kids in the first place probably was not a good idea.
Then, think about if you could truly be happy with your kid once they get through being a baby. Maybe teenager and adult years are more your style? If so, then discuss with your husband that he needs to shoulder most of the parenting responsibilities until the kid gets older. You need to figure out a career that will support your family and pretty much have your husband be a stay at home dad.
If you truly never see yourself enjoying being a mom, tell your husband that this compromise is not working for you, you hate your life, and divorce him and leave your kid with him. Send child support if it is needed and back out of his life. Let your husband move on and find someone that will enjoy being a mother to your child.
I do not think you need therapy. I think you compromised on something that was too big to compromise on. You either back out of the contract or live a miserable life and make an innocent life miserable in the process.
You get to choose how you feel about everything.
You get to choose how you act on every emotion.
You get to prioritize and do the right thing.
Anyone who trains for marathons has what it takes to love her life.
You get to choose to get the right training to do it.
He's not going to get easier to love the less you love him.
Can I just say that the opinion "the only option here is to hire a sitter" is making me a little crazy? I don't want to come off like some nutjob, but that isn't the only option. That is the option that allows you to continue doing what YOU want to do. I think @mihow has very eloquently outlined the position that it isn't about just you anymore.
While I understand that having someone look after your baby would give you more time to do what you want it would also give you signifcantly less time with your infant in what is clearly an already busy life.
These kinds of decisions are the basis for your future relationship with your son. While it is sometimes difficult to choose to spend time doing things that are not what you would 'like' to be doing, you need to look at this from a more global perspective. This can't just be about "how does @zorbs get to do all the things she wants" it has to be about how do you figure out how to balance your life so that you AND your son are happy and fulfilled.
Like @mihow pointed out, things have changed now and you need to make sacrifices. And as hard as they may seem I can assure you that they are 100% worth it in the end.
Browse By Category
- The "Stranger Danger" Movement essentially started with Etan Patz. How do you feel now that his alleged killer has confessed? (link inside)
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- In your work day, how many hours are you actively "working"?
- Should I or should I not of said something?! More inside...

