Penelope

I totally agree with vakadesign but at the same time how much does it suck to not be interested in someone but be told they aren't interested in you? He could think these are dates or he could just want to be friends with you as well.

I think there is a very playful and clear way to do this without actually sitting him down to tell him you don't want to date him. Which would be awkward. Don't do romantic things. Reference how much he feels like a brother to you. Say things like "I'm so glad we're friends." Talk about how much you like being able to have a male friend without things being awkward.

Of course there is a chance he could see this as some sort of challenge but the same could happen if you explicitly state you don't want to date him. There's a pretty slim chance he won't catch on that you don't see yourself dating him though.

Make it about your child, 100% of the time. Easier said than done. I have physical custody, but I bend over backwards to let my ex-husband know that it is never about me; it is always about the best interests of our son. I have gone so far as to change my schedule to accommodate his, request with the courts that my ex-husband's wages never be garnished and I have our son call his dad about every other day he doesn't see him (obviously not possible in your case, yet). If my son's dad calls and says he misses him, I rearrange my schedule and drive our son to visit his dad or have extra weekend time with him. We keep everything out of the courts- visitation, holidays, child support, etc.

My accommodating ways may seem ridiculous, but I think the non-custodial parent can often feel as though they are less important. I have way more time with my son, but I want to make sure his dad feels like he is involved. End result? My son sees his dad every single week, I get a check in our agreed upon amount every single week and my son never wonders if both his parents adore him. He knows.

And just to give you a back story, my ex-husband has two DUI's on his record and a history of partying, and at first got an attorney and was trying to fight me for custody at the beginning of the divorce...so it's not like I was dealing with this fantastic guy.

Basically...keep it about your precious child and let the dad know he matters and his opinions are valued. It really lessens the drama.

The XX, Phoenix, Brother Ali, Atmosphere, Brandi Carlile, Metric, Andrew Bird

It's totally 'do-able'. But both of you have to honest with yourselves about why you want to remain friends. If one of you is carrying a torch for the other one and hasn't dealt with the fact that the romantic aspect of your relationship is over, it could spell disaster.

Just try to be as honest with yourselves and each other as you can be.

I'm friends - and comfortably so - with several people I used to date.