Brookelyn Bridge

I've broken so many toes it isn't even funny. Typically, I snag them on a chair and they tweak outwards. That leaves me limping and/or on crutches for awhile. I never realized how vital our toes are until I broke one.

Last week, I fell UP the stairs. Two times. No injuries thankfully, but it goes to show just how graceful I am.

One winter, I was out skijoring with the dogs when the neighbors happened to let their dogs out to piss right as I was being towed by. My dogs made a 90-degree turn and I was immediately on the ground with a messed up knee. My coworker even drew a cartoon mocking me because I had to explain to everyone why I couldn't walk normal. I still have it.

When I was pregnant with my first child, I ended up with a pregnancy tumor on my forehead. If I even looked at it funny, it would burst open and bleed everywhere like I had just taken a bullet to the head. I was trying on a sweater at Old Navy once and the seam of the sweater brushed against it, causing it to break open and bleed. I had to rush out of the dressing room and ask the attendant for some napkins or something so I wouldn't ruin the clothing. She was (rightfully) horrified. I got that shit cauterized that week.

Me: "B, stop throwing things!!"

B: "I'm NOT! I'm helping it fly!"

2 adults + 2 kids = 10 loads a week on average

2 loads to wash the nap mats for daycare
1 load of whites
2 loads of darks
1 load of jeans
1 load of residual darks and the blankies for daycare
1 load of delicates
1 load of towels
1 load of bedding

Every now and then I get motivated and wash all the sheets in the house or all the towels. And about once a month I wash bibs and dishtowels.

I think it's akin to giving up your seat to an elderly person (or a pregnant person). It's just good manners. I think it's nice they have them. And this is me saying this with two pregnancies under my belt and two young children and I have never used one of these spaces even though they have been available to me.

I can see where they would be incredibly useful to a lot of women with young children. Getting out of the house with a new baby is difficult enough. Lugging a carseat halfway across a parking lot is not fun!

And if you get all up in arms over something this trivial, than it's time for you to take a vacation.

I tend to park at the end of the lot and grab a cart on my walk in to the store. Then, when I'm headed back to my car, I push the cart super fast and jump on the back and ride it the whole way back to the car. The kids love it! (So do I). And people watching get a good laugh.